Easter Sunday

When I woke up this morning I thought about many things... I saw the sun shining through my window and was slightly energized then remembered it was Easter. I thought about how much I wished Sofia were here with us so I could dress her up in a cute dress and take an obscene amount of photos of her. At 6 1/2 months she would have been sitting up, smiling, and with all that hair she'd probably be sporting a pony tail with a cute little bow. I know it's useless to think of those 'what-if's' because those moments were never in the plan for her. It was all in MY mind - my hopes & dreams as being her mom.

Earlier in the week Tim e-mailed me at work to say, "we need to get an Easter basket for Sofia & Sam to share". I thought that was so sweet of him to think of doing that and I was surprised at myself for not thinking of it first!

I know Easter isn't just about kids, eggs, candy & a bunny rabbit. Just like Christmas isn't just about Santa Claus, his reindeer & presents. That said, while it is about Jesus we can't ignore that Easter is very much a children's holiday. So naturally it's hard for us on a day we thought we'd have our first child with us, missing out on doing all the things parents do with their kids. Yes, we are that corny couple who would hide the eggs for a 6 month old. We would buy an Easter basket even though a baby can't really know what's going on. It's the enjoyment and excitement of having a family that we miss so much.

So we bought the Easter basket - Tim picked it out. (He picked out a HUGE one at first and I declined. He thought more candy would fit inside - him trying to be funny) We found a nice white ceramic cross, a little brown bunny, some plastic eggs and two wooden painted eggs with bows. I decided I'd paint Sofia's name on the pink one, Sam's name on the yellow.

Easter basket:

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We visited Sofia out at the cemetery this morning and brought her another mini Easter basket with eggs as well as two more decorations that stick in the ground. One's a ladybug and the other is a bee. The cemetery is a busy place on Easter Sunday morning. Many of the other baby graves had cute decorations. One near Sofia was buried in 1979 and had flowers, a cute windmill, and a full Easter basket. Wow- 31 years later and the parents are still dedicated to visiting their baby. Of course! I know we will do the same.

Mini Easter basket at cemetery:

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Ladybug & Bee decorations (notice the flowers have been in the vase for a week & still pretty!!):

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My mom happened to arrive at the cemetery shortly after we did. She had a cute painted egg with a bow to leave for Sofia. I snapped a photo of it before putting it down on her stone:

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Ladybug decoration left by my Aunt Donna, Sofia's Great Aunt:

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While standing at Sofia's spot, a coworker of mine stopped by. She said she was paying a visit to her mom who is buried just up the hill from Sofia. She said her mom loved babies and that she's no doubt watching over Sofia. We thought that was nice of her to say.

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I have to believe that Sofia and Sam are up in heaven surrounded by love and all our family that have passed and that they're taking good care of them for us. I think He is watching them for us too, and that they are filled with happiness.

Flowers left at Sofia's spot by Tim's parents this week:

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Happy Easter Sofia & Sam.

We love you. XXOOXXOO